Last week, Frank did a job for Jimmy Buffett's personal chef. Of course, in Frank fashion, he attempted to break the ice with a joke.
Frank: So, I said to him, “I bet you cook a lot of Pop-tarts.” (He recounts this with pride and a pump of his eyebrows.) Get it? Pop-tarts?
Me: No, I don't get it. Why didn't you say “I bet you cook a lot of cheeseburgers with lettuce and tomato, Heinz 57, and french fried potatoes.” You know, from Cheeseburger in Paradise?
Frank: Man, I wish I'd thought of that. But, he mentions Pop-tarts in a song too?
Me: What song?
Me: What in the hell are you talking about?
Frank: (singing) “Blew out my flip-flop, stepped on a Pop-tart, cut my heel had to cruise on back home.”
Me: Pop-top. Not Pop-tart. How would you slice your foot on a pastry? Think about it.
This is not the first time Frank has gotten lyrics drastically wrong. Here are a few other adorable examples of my husband's versions of songs:
Kenny Roger's Lucille- “With four hundred children and a crop in the field.”
Stevie Nicks' Edge of Seventeen- Just like the one-winged dove sings a song sounds like she's singing.”
Black Eyed Peas' Imma Be - “I'm a bee. I'm a bee. I'm gonna' be a bumble bee.”
In each case, I had to explain to him the error of his ways:
“Honey, if they had four hundred children, they'd have plenty of farm help and he wouldn't be worried about the crop.”
“What would a one-winged dove have to sing about?”
“Why would Fergie want to be a bumblebee when instead she could be
'poppin' that bubbly, coolin' and livin' that good life'?"
Of course, I also so have mangled some lyrics in my time. In the Wyclef Jean song, Bubblegoose, instead of “he caught a bullet in his bubblegoose,”--as even the title implies--I sang “he caught a bullet in his elbow groove.” And, I've spent twenty years belting out “Medieval Woman,” instead of “E-E-vil Woman” during that ELO song. It happens to the best of us. And, it's always hilarious.
Come on...admit it...and then SHARE...cause you know it's happened to you, too.
the bourbonistA, Promoting Debauchery and stamping out political-correctness one blog at a time.